What Is Real Faith?

Years ago when we still lived in California we were praying through the decision of whether or not to move out of state. If I’m honest I didn’t want to go…at all. I loved where we lived. The neighborhood, the community, the friends, the Disney passes, and the amenities of living on the coast (as well as near the mountains) was hard to even imagine walking away from.

I loved our lives there in CA, but during a time of prayer, I felt a deep impression from the Lord we were to come here, specifically to Texas. We had a number of offers on the table and I really wanted to accept a role at another church in Nashville. (I figured, if we’re going to have to leave CA at least our new home could be somewhere super fun like the music capital of the world!)

The expectation I had of moving here was to live life more simply, more slowly, more intentionally. Living in a county with over 3 million people sometimes felt like a rat race, a bit suffocating at times. I longed for a slower-paced schedule, a beautiful garden in our backyard, chickens that lived in a cute pink chicken coop, and deep community. I remember telling people as if on repeat, “I want a porch swing, with the time to sit on it.”

To put it simply: Things have not at all worked out the way we expected. We were WAY off. Not even close.

I’ve had to face the question over and over again…Did I misunderstand the Lord? Did I get the wrong message? Did he say one thing and I heard another? Were we never meant to come here after all? Because why would God lead us into such pain?!

The answer is now as clear as day. We came here to learn a critical life lesson: not all things work out how you expect them to. 

One of the deepest traumas we can experience as believers is the injury of expectation. When things are the opposite of what we desire it causes significant pain and has the potential to rattle our faith in many ways. We can begin to question God or think we might have missed a turn somewhere in life.

Maybe it’s a relationship you thought would be restored, a circumstance you want to change, a situation you never would have asked for…maybe you’ve been betrayed, ghosted by a loved one, persecuted, fired, abandoned, slandered, or simply have a hope that never happened.

There is always pain between expectation and reality.

And if you find yourself in a season of life where things just haven’t gone how you would have expected, here’s one bit of encouragement my time here in Texas has gifted me:

Real faith is faith that has experienced testing. 

In those seasons of unmet expectations there is pain, yes, but your faith will deepen in ways you cannot yet comprehend. The growth and intimacy with the Lord is something you would have never known to ask for. When your faith is tested and yet remains strong in many trials (1 Peter 5:9-10) it creates a holy connection between you and Jesus. There is nothing like the bond and camaraderie that is formed when you suffer as Jesus has. There is a friendship that comes through those seasons. He is the empathetic savior, and you are connecting with him through your pain, weaknesses, and sorrow. 

And because of that, the Bible encourages us to rejoice in our trials! There is a good, no…GREAT…work happening that goes FAR beyond even your wildest dreams and most magnificent expectations! The reward for trusting Him will be the very salvation of your soul! There is so much joy in that!

The Bible encourages us to endure trials, knowing that our perseverance is producing something far more precious than gold—faith refined by fire. It’s in these moments (or sometimes very long seasons) of testing that we discover the depth of God’s love and the strength of His promises.

When life takes unexpected turns, and the weight of disappointment feels unbearable, remember that God’s ways are higher than our ways, and His thoughts are higher than our thoughts (Isaiah 55:8-9). He is weaving and morphing and designing a story that is far greater than we can see in the moment, a story that ultimately brings glory to Him and good to all who love Him.

So, hold fast to His Word, even when the road is hard, when the dreams fall to the wayside, and when the path is unclear. Trust that He is working all things together for your good (Romans 8:28), even when the evidence seems contrary. Your faith, though tested by fire, will result in praise, glory, and honor when Jesus Christ is revealed (1 Peter 1:7).

In the end, it’s not about the fulfillment of our expectations or the fulfillment of our dreams, but about the profoundly eternal work of the transformation of our hearts. Through every trial, every disappointment, and every unmet expectation, God is drawing you closer to Himself, teaching you to rely not on what is seen, but on what is unseen. For what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal (2 Corinthians 4:18).

Take heart, dear friends, and continue to walk in faith, knowing that the One who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus (Philippians 1:6). There is purpose in your pain, and there is joy set before you.

It’s now clearer than ever…my dream of sitting on a porch swing was far too small of a dream…